7/31/01
Who is 
Madame Rae?

8/01/01
Am I your
 mother?

8/01/01
Twerp

8/02/01
Rectifier or
 Numbuzz

8/02/01
Crop Reports

8/8/01
Big Game Hunter D.
Courts Disaster

8/9/01
Bill's Mom
Gets Cloned

When do the swallows return to Capistrano?

          ~ La Di Di La La Di Dah

You raise a fascinating example of what happens when you mix Christianity and Tourism...

The Capistranians of Capistrano, California would like you to think that the swallows arrive and leave every year on the same days March 19 and October 23rd (by our silly little Gregorian calendar that tourists use to book tours).  And not only that, but on two holy days!  Supposedly these Christian birds arrive at San Juan Mission on St. Joseph's day and leave on San Juan's day itself.  Hence, the "Miracle of the Swallows of Capistrano".

In reality, these birds are much more Pagan and Practical...

They arrive in Capistrano on or near the spring Equinox and arrive back in Goya, Argentina on or near the fall Equinox.  Actual arrival time can vary by weeks and depends on weather and food supply.

Of course, it is very likely that many of our Christian holidays were based on Pagan celebrations of the changing of the seasons.  But that's another story for another day.

          Another view...                             and another...

How does the smell of bakelite pertain to me?

          ~ Plastico, West New York, NJ

On the surface, you and bakelite have much in common...

You are both readily identifiable by your smell (which will not wash off with hot water), clunky sound, and date back to beginnings of the 20th century.

However, bakelite is worth money these days, and under that surface, I'd much rather be around the bakelite...

What color panties am I wearing?

Do you find entertainment value in NASCAR?

When will the world end?

          ~ Unsigned

Since it has been a bit since you asked the question, Madame Rae has had a chance to view several pairs.  Madame Rae compliments you on  your choice of styles.  But her favorite is the white bikini-cut with little red hearts.  Very becoming.

Madame Rae does not have time for entertainment.  However, she is developing a divination method involving the intricate motions of the vehicles around the track during specific cycles of the moon.

The universe is currently in the process of ending, of course, but it will take many millions of years.  If you mean the end of humanity, the end of Earth, or the end of this reality, well... those are whole different questions.

But feel free to check out several other opinions:

Can you help the world answer this question:

Will human cloning work??

Would you yourself ever want to be cloned??

          ~ Just Wondering, Bill's Mom

For more
info.

Yes.  All signs point to the following scenario:

Human cloning will work, but there will be several problems:
          1.  The clones will have severe health problems similar to those experienced by the cloned
               sheep.
          2.  The clones still have to go through the maturing process in real time.  This means the 
               public will get bored waiting for the clones to grow up.

However, within the next thirty years we will be using human cloning technology to cure diseases and give infertile people a chance to create gametes.

Lastly, no, Madame Rae would not want to be cloned.  You could never have another Madame Rae you would just have several small, precocious, very psychic children running around ... No, thank you.

Should I cut my hair?

Also, did you have to pay extra for the flashing crescent moons? (In my opinion they're very cool.)

          ~ Big Game Hunter D.

First of all, yes.  Cut your hair if you like...  and if you like to be less unique looking, have people play with your hair less often, and have women find you less attractive!

Second, of course they're cool.  (Thank you.)  And Madame Rae pays for her psychic powers in ways you cannot know...         but the crescent moons are free web graphics.

I am a small farmer in need of agricultural advice.  So which is it, wheat or corn?

          ~ Looking for a Cash Crop
                    Minot, ND

Corn is the answer to many things...

I'll be at Aqueduct next Monday and ... uh ... well, I got a tip on the second race.  I was told #6, "Rectifier" is a sure thing.  Any thoughts?

          ~ Putting It Down
                    Montclair, NJ

Now, now, Putting It Down.  If Madame Rae shared her knowledge of the Races with you, 
she wouldn't be able to dispense Wisdom for free!

Am I really a self absorbed twerp?

          ~ smarting from a friend's assessment
                    Montclair, NJ

It sounds to the Great Madame Rae like you should be smarting from a good slap across the face!  It is beneath my powers of divination to even answer your question ...

Am I your mother?

          ~ Rachel's Mom

Rachel's Mom's Reply

An impressively deep question, Rachel's Mom.  I am the daughter of every woman and no woman, of course.

Madame Rae,

Who is Madame Rae?

          ~ Layla's Mom

This is the spiritual question I have been asking myself for many . . . many . . . many moons.

Madame Rae is a great Seer who sees the answers to ALL your questions.
Ask and you shall hear the answer . . .