Meet the Family

In 2003 HotU split into two houses:

HotU Franchise North kept Mar, Bill, Anakin, and Santiago
HotU Franchise South Central kept Rachel, Layla, Katherine, and Trout and has since added Dakkai (see below)

Have no fear, HotU lives on . . .

Layla: By day a barista schleping coffee for jittery caffeine addicts. By night puts the les in lesbian separatist frat house. a writer of non-categorical misrepresentations of prose/poetry. apparently incapable of writing in complete sentences (this evening it is either fragments or run-ons you get no other options). also well known for saying things that others would know to be inappropriate loudly in public and for running about the house in various states of undress. she is married to rachel and katherine.

Mar: "i sell medicare...i'm evil." she puts the frat house in lesbian separatist frat house. married for one year still thinks marriage is an urban legend. frequently laughs at layla when she says inappropriate things loudly in public. I also have pretensions of writing about feminist reinterpretation of mythology. Webmistress. Loved by mosquitoes far and wide. Alias: Traci (or is it Traci, alias: Mar? I'm not even sure m'self).

Bill: "i study fishes" (not just fishes he's an aquatic biologist) and is rumored to be married to mar though the jury is still out on that one. he is a brew master for high street home brewery (tm). hand in hand with mar, puts the frat house in lesbian separatist frat house.

Rachel: really really wants to save the world but is unsure exactly how to go about it and is still working on her ability to leap tall buildings in a single bound but is definitely freakishly strong. she's the one putting the bi into lesbian separatist frat house. she's married to layla and katherine. Unfortunately she has joined the ranks of evil and now sells medicare with Mar.

Katherine: shleps kayaks for money and the johnson family of companies. sometimes she poses as a 450 pound black man named bubba j mcsmith but only when she's on the internet. and for those of you paying attention to what's left she puts the an in lesbian separatist frat house. (we aren't sure what that means either but since she's not exactly sure what she is anyway we figured that works) she writes real honest to goodness poetry. she's married to layla and rachel.

Anakin: Oldest and queerest of the 3 cats currently officially residing at the House of the Unstable (yep, even the cats are challenging gender roles). Likes: pellets, tuna, killing birds, corn, refried beans, cold boiled cabbage. Dislikes: empty food bowls, rattling tin-foil, vacuums, other cats, and especially hates sneezes. Distinguishing features: bandito whiskers, white tipped tail, stomps when he walks. Can say "mom," and "now," "open," and "hello." Aliases: Bran, Branakin, Branacaster, Branakinch the Fearful Jesuit, Anakitty, Branakitty, Freak, Bitch, Queen. Travels: Lakeway Ave, High Street, Ferry Ave, Killeen Texas, 22nd St, Birchwood Ave.

Santiago Garcia Durango: Brought home by a former housemate in a former house after we explicitly said no new cats. We kept the cat and got rid of the housemate. Most aloof, coolest and grumpiest of the three cats. Took over the old neighborhood kitty mafia when D retired. Spends much of his time in the bedroom. Likes: sleeping on Bill's chest, taking up the entire bed, clawing you and biting you. Strongly appreciates fresh water. Dislikes: Bran. Tolerates Trout. Probably suffers from Seasonal Affective Disorder. Distinguishing features: stunning bulls-eye pattern, torn right ear, mysterious large scar on his forehead, ability to heal at a miraculous rate (which is why the big scar is a mystery), barometer nose (Santi predicts the rain), kink in tail. Once had a look-alike in the High Street neighborhood name pseudo-Sant. Aliases: SG Durango, Santi, Sant, SG. Travels: Humbolt St. (that's a long story), High St, 22nd St, Birchwood Ave.

Kilgore Trout: Youngest and friendliest of the 3 current cats. Named for Kilgore Trout, everybody's favorite Kurt Vonnegut character. Talks a lot, not always sure what he's saying. Loves George, even though George is too dumb to notice. Loves Bill, but Bill's smart enough to know. Since moving out of original HotU, became a serial killer and has been under house arrest ever since (which he seems to enjoy). Likes: killing anything, following Bill around the house, playing the "race up the stairs" game and winning (even if he has to cheat), Mar's Chevelle, chicken nuggets, wrestling Dakkai, making pointed comments that nobody understands. Dislikes: dogs (except Dakkai, although the first couple of weeks were a little shaky) freak him out a little but really he doesn't dislike anything or anybody.

Dakkai: First inaugural dog of the unstable. He's not a fox. He's not a Husky puppy. He's not a Corgi or a Basenji. He's a Shiba Inu. Likes: wrestling Trout, fetch, walks, tricks (he wants to join the circus), ignoring commands, running away when he's called, chewing cardboard or paper, canned green beans, watermelon, doing brodies on the bed, the neighbor dog Gracie, anyone who comes to the door, and anything he can steal off your plate. Dislikes: bulldogs and boston terriers (a lot!), elizabethan collars, having his nails clipped, getting a bath, and being denied anything off your plate. Aliases: Whacko Dakko, Munchkin, Munchkin Butt, Munchkin Breath, Monkey, Buddy, Buzzby, Toto.

Diomedes: Anakin's brother. Moved out, actually, when we got a fourth cat (Trout). Now goes by the name Clebon. Likes: food, spraying, loves his cat nip. Dislikes: everything else. Distinguishing features: really big boned grey cat. Very large head. Doesn't talk much. Aliases: D, Big D.

Brendon: played Diablo II (tm)...a lot. he schleped pepsi. he really really loves soccer so much so it makes him limp once a month (on his feet you pervert). he moved out and had kids . . . twins even.